Writing Violence: Thoughts on Authenticity and Spiritual Bypassing

Here in Minnesota, we woke up to over sixteen inches of uninformed snow upon the ground. Most of the city was shut down last night, as well as people have been perplexing to puncture out today. Me? we was out taking pictures, together with the a single above of my street.

So, we was meddlesome to see what competence come of the last post, which isn't my unchanging essay style. In particular, what we am curious about is the ways which we can write authentically about difficult, disliked patterns as well as ways of being in the world. Friday's post was about aggressiveness. Competition. Excessive effort. Turning one's devout make use of in to the contest. And additionally the voices in the heads which can arise from such energies.

Peter left the following comment, which we can suppose was how others felt which review the post:

I suffer the energy in your post -- nonetheless find all which hard-ass, motherfucker denunciation of small interest. as well testosterone-laden as well as agressive for my taste. conjunction imagining nor blogging (nor living for which matter) is the contest.

i find which there's sufficient pang in the world, nonetheless creating some-more underneath the guise of practice.

First off, those similar to Peter who have been unchanging readers of this blog know which I'm not since to tossing foul denunciation around carelessly. Most of my essay steers transparent of it since it's not required for the situation. we actually lend towards to respond in the identical approach to copious anathema as Peter did to this sold post. Adding cuss disproportion to indignant essay tends to hook both the reader as well as writer towards some-more anger. And adding cuss disproportion in other kinds of essay often usually causes distraction, confusion, and/or aversion in readers.

However, the single of the weaknesses, in my opini! on, of m ost devout essay out there is the disaster to demonstrate the generosity of experience, as well as afterwards make use of which countenance as the approach in to bargain the low truths of this life. What we find is which the bluntness, rawness, even nastiness which sometimes litters the minds as well as even the actions gets abstracted, shunted, even turned in reserve out of the belief which presenting such things will usually means some-more suffering. Or is definitely wrong, the no-no for people upon the devout path.

Let's take the specific e.g. from Friday's post.

Zazen posture seems to be the large deal for the lot of people. Those who can't do the full lotus posture often outlay months as well as even years perplexing to emulate it, thinking which this it is the order for awakening. And when the physique fundamentally gets sick and/or old, there's the sure volume of pique as well as pang which comes up for those who have been attached to sitting full lotus, as well as right away can't.

Being in the group, generally during retreats, can ramp up this kind of energy. I've gifted this myself. You've been we do zazen all day, your entire physique aches, as well as nonetheless we demeanour around, as well as many everyone else is still in full lotus, or half lotus. And what do we do? You stay in lotus, even nonetheless you're literally upon fire with pain.

What's the thoughts demeanour similar to underneath these conditions. Well, it's probably something similar to this: Better do full lotus motherfucker - nothing of which half-assed seiza dais shit.. If we have been honest, that's what it looks like. Maybe your thoughts doesn't have the cuss words, nonetheless the charge which brought we to keep sitting when we unequivocally shouldn't includes an aggressive, sometimes unequivocally nasty narrative. There's no getting around that.

So, here's the thing. How do we write about such experiences?

How do we convey them authentically, embedded in the t! eachings we've been given, so which others competence gain the little insight?

Maybe some-more importantly though, how do we stay loyal to where we have been at, demonstrate entirely where we have been at, nonetheless minimizing or exaggerating?

Because what we see in myself, as well as additionally in so many others we do devout writing, from the many beginner student to the many seasoned teacher, is the bent to dance around the feverishness of which which we collectively have deemed taboo.

Anger. Hard-assed aggression. Violent thoughts. Rage.

These have been the little of the practice which we "spiritual types" avoid, minimize, disguise in psychological or other epitome language. And why? We're triggered. We're afraid. We do not know how to handle it. The teachings tell us these things have been destructive, means suffering, as well as shouldn't be indulged in.

And it's absolutely loyal which violence, rage, aggression, extreme annoy - all of which is destructive, pang producing, as well as blinding us from the inherent wisdom.

Yet, we additionally consider it's no fluke which these unequivocally same places lend towards to be the many usual shadows of people who have been in religious as well as devout communities, or who have committed themselves to such the path. We have the sense of the destructiveness of those various forms of violence, as well as nonetheless instead of truly confronting it within the selves, we do all sorts of bypassing as well as afterwards consternation why we can't seem to be open around conflicts which appear in the lives, the communities, even online.

Consider, in contrast, something which is some-more savoury to work with. Like grief. Or guilt. Or fear.

I have listened the little amazingly beautiful, detailed talks joining deeply personal practice of pique to profoundly universal teachings about grief. No mincing words. No avoidance. Just raw experience, which is afterwards remade in to wisdom, as well as in we do so, ! is an co untenance of compassion for all of us who additionally have been experiencing grief.

The same doesn't seem to be loyal when it comes to operative with aroused tendencies. Grief is embraced by devout types, since rage, for example, is almost zodiacally deserted from the beginning. And that's the problem. It's deserted from the beginning, instead of taken in, entirely gifted as well as documented, until it drops away.

It is any consternation there is so most war as well as assault in the world.

I'm fiercely meddlesome in how I, as well as others, competence navigate this territory some-more honestly, some-more clearly, exposing sufficient of the soreness to ourselves as well as others nonetheless falling in to the engulf of it. What did the thoughts of the male who was shaking his fist during which bus Friday afternoon demeanour similar to exactly? Who was which "me" which came as well as afterwards went, nonetheless will come again as well as again if it goes unexamined?

Because usually saying he was angry, he was indulging in anger, he was attached to an outcome, he was this he was which - usually saying which doesn't cut it. It cuts what IT was off.

Last night, we was snowed in. we listened to the podcast interview with Buddhist clergyman Reggie Ray, during which he describes the make use of called "Dark Meditation." Essentially, it's going in to finish darkness as well as staying with whatever comes up. After the interview, we went in to my bathroom, lonesome up all the entry points of light, as well as sat for an hour in the darkness. Very interesting. You know your physique is there, the bathtub is there, the toilet is there - nonetheless we can't see any of it. And it doesn't take prolonged prior to we start feeling disoriented, not in an horrible way, nonetheless in the "what is this experience" kind of way. The healthy oddity any of us has, nonetheless which often is blocked, comes forth rsther than easily from the darkness.

Where is the healthy oddi! ty towar ds the violent, rage-driven aspects of the lives? Why is it which instead of curiosity, so often what arises in reply to "internal" assault is guilt, shame, and/or fear?

What was so engaging to me about essay which post upon Friday was which when we began, it was mostly going to be about job out the charge as well as attacks we saw in The Zennist's as well as Uku's posts. And yet, as we wrote the post, it became transparent to me which we do which wasn't unequivocally fair or helpful. In fact, not usually that, nonetheless it would have been reproducing the unequivocally patterns I'm talking about here. Take the demeanour during these guys. Talking shit about their associate practitioners. Look during how indignant their disproportion are. We should be kinder to the associate practitioners. Blah. Blah. Blah. All of which is true, nonetheless it's usually partial of the story. I'm similar to them too. You have been similar to them too. The usually disproportion is which we didn't put the post out similar to that.

So, what's behind the desire to contrition them? What is it about indignant and/or aroused writing, indignant and/or aroused thinking, which possibly seductively draws us in or makes us run far, distant away? And what can we do about it?

That's what we became meddlesome in while essay which post Friday. And this post is the continuation of that, in it's own labyrinth way.